With every worthless word we get more far away

"I tried and tried to let you know
I love you, but I'm letting go
It may not last, but I don't know
I just don't know"

This is from Nothing Lasts Forever by Maroon 5, I cited it on this blog at the start of my exchange semester in the US when I was going through a different heartbreak. What did JK Rowling say in her Harvard commencement speech again? -

"I am not dull enough to suppose that because you are young, gifted and well-educated, you have never known hardship or heartbreak. Talent and intelligence never yet inoculated anyone against the caprice of the Fates..."

I like to think I've grown up since 2011, but JK Rowling's right - no matter how old you are or how wise you are or how smart you are, no one can go through life without heartbreak. I can only wish that as an adult, I still grow from every loss. I'm still a strong believer of "better to have loved and lost than not at all" but as I think of the next decade(s) ahead of me, I get sadder knowing that there will definitely be people I have to say goodbye to.

I have dreams where I lose my parents and I always wake up crying. It's true that nothing lasts forever and promising that something will always be the case is such a huge and dangerous thing to do. Always is a word that carries a heavy burden and shouldn't be said without it being meant. So while I can't promise to always be by your side, or promise that we'll always be in each other's lives, I can promise that I'll always remember you.

Brendan quoted something from my blog tonight which made us scroll through my past posts from a period of my life that might've been harder than what I'm currently going through. This is from the same 'nothing lasts forever' post -

"I'm not sure if I mentioned this before but I have a really awesome desktop wallpaper right now. The night before I left Melbourne, I was in the city and we commented on how pretty the view is, it's actually really nice and I never get tired of it. So then, the next day in between packing and stressing about packing, Jackson uploads a photo of the exact same view that I love so much. And now I have that view here I guess, I brought Southbank with me. It's really nice having a bit of home here and nothing beats the fact that it's a photo taken by a friend."